Throughout time, civilizations have created phrases to advise us on how to live our lives, what the best course of action is, and general advice. However many of them are, somewhat ambiguous and the true meaning remains unattainable such as a “stitch in time saves nine”. However, others still hold some relevance, even now, and perhaps we should look back at the advice of our ancestors and take it, use it, and remember it. So, starting from now, I (as often as I can) will look into the proverbs that the true meaning I wish to rediscover and carry on to you. Starting with…

 For most of you who read this blog (my circulation is pretty low), the dreaded academic rite of passage we know as exams are just around the corner and as much as we fear it- the revising, the lack of a social life, the mere sight of the exam hall- it does mean another year is almost over. And how quick has it gone this year?

Not only is it a time for knuckling down, but also for a little self reflection; the changes of the year, difficulties etc. Because, in truth, we are always being tested. Take a chance now, and think of things in your day-to-day life that is exam worthy. If you’re like me, then the very first test we all must take is the waking up. Dreams are so much nicer than reality, yet to pass the “school of life” waking up is just the tip of the iceberg of trials: not just for teenagers, but for everyone. The Waking Up Exam is not a subject on it’s own, but a minor part in the biggest qualification the whole world face every single day. And that qualification: Keeping the Faith. Keeping the Faith is the crux to all other tests. Think of it like the writing of school exams- you can’t do an awful lot without it. You go into an test without knowing how to write, you might as well not have turned up! 

Without faith, we wouldn’t have the motivation to do anything in life, academic or otherwise. We really would be in our pajamas in bed, all day. As idyllic as that sounds, after a while it would be pretty dull. There is only so much Jeremy Kyle one person can take. Faith is motivation. If we didn’t have faith, we would think “What’s the point in doing that?” I mean faith of all types. Faith in love; faith in religion; faith in friends; faith in family; faith in ourselves and faith that everything will turn out well. The proverbial light at the end of the tunnel. If you don’t have any faith, even just one of the examples, you are already on the bed and already bored of Jezza. So, you need to revive your faith.

Now for yet another metaphor. We have established that Life equals School, Waking Up equals test, Keeping the Faith means knowing how to write, but what about the pen we write with: what does that equal to in the School of Life? AS far as I can deduce the pen to Keeping the Faith in the School of Life is whatever makes up happy and gives the energy and the drive to achieve. Friends, family, music, hobbies, even stupid things like TV shows, all of them can help us, inspire us. How can TV help keep your faith, I hear you say. Easy, we watch TV to escape our lives, yet in truth we are only escaping to someone else’s reality, even if it is fictional. For a moment, we fall in love with the characters and, despite those who think they are above such things, we become deeply affected by what we see. So even if you don’t have faith, those characters that you admire they probably do, so draw on them. Think about what they would in your situation. Make them your imaginary motivational speaker: encouraging, motivating, inspiring. The difference in you when your faith has been renewed will be extraordinary! 

Just like we’ve come to the end of a school year, we have come to the end of another blog, and by now you’re probably wondering, with all this talk of faith, what keeps me, the boy behind the screen, going: how I keep the faith. (And if you didn’t think it, I’m sharing anyway.) I draw on lots of things to keep me going, most of them I’ve detailed above. But what really helps me keep the faith is the future, my dreams. If you dream your ideal future life, you can achieve it. If you can have faith in the future, you can have faith now!

And for my friends who read this, and anyone really about to participate in exams, you don’t need good luck, just faith. And don’t worry, if your faith falters,I have faith in you.  

From time to time, you will probably hear some adults, be it parent, grandparents, or other, moaning about teenagers who moan about how hard their lives are. Adults then reply that the days we’re living now, in secondary school, are supposed to be the best days of our lives and we’ll look back and reminisce on how easy we had. For our sake’s, I can only hope it get’s better than this. For most of you reading this, you’ve finished your GCSE’s, enjoyed the nice long “summer” and have returned refreshed and renewed for the next educational step: A Levels. And also for most of you, you’ve probably already had a break down over how stressed you are or how exhausted you are all the time: I know I have. If this is true for you, it’s probably almost unfathomable that adults have the nerve to say these days are the best of your lives. And if you’re anything like me, you’re probably thinking what a load of bullshit!

Personally, I totally know where everyone who agrees with that statement comes from ‘cause to be perfectly honest, it’s so true. Adults say they have to worry about work, finances, children, family, homes and the like; yes, that probably is very stressful and I’m sure we’ve all seen the effects of when these responsibilities get too much for adults. However, if you think about it, the panic-inducing situations that we teens have to suffer through are much worse than mortgages and office politics. It’s been decades since our parents (and even grandparents) have had to face the absolute horror of an oral exam when all you can really focus on is whether the teacher realized what they put on in the morning; it’s been decades since they’ve had to look blankly at a whiteboard, struggling over the exact dates leading up to Stalin’s rise to power and it’s been decades since they’ve had to suffer the embarrassment of accidently knocking over a breaker in chemistry, exposing the class to the production of some toxic gas. If they knew the horror we had to endure 5 hours a day, 5 days a week for almost 7 years, they’d think differently before making such rash judgments as these days being so care free and wonderful!

And let’s not forget that it’s not just school we have to worry about, but everything else too. Why is so-and-so not speaking to me? Why can’t I look like that? Will he ever notice me? It’s not just educational responsibilities we’re faced with, but we have to bow down and battle with the ever increasing social pressures of being adolescents. Whether it be body image, unrequited love, the need to fit it or something else, the social situations and choices we have to make are major and, for 5 to 7 years, life changing. Adults no longer have to deal with behind-your-back bitches, the so called popular people, the freaks, the geeks or the nerds; they’re all just adults now. What I find even more infuriating is the fact that adults will say that they’ve gone through all that before and they managed to survive now, but what they fail to consider is how the lives of teens, both inside and outside of school has evolved since the days they were there and it’s not got any easier.

But of course, just because how it’s done, taught or thought about doesn’t mean that our parents haven’t suffered anymore than we have or that they could impart some words of wisdom however patronising they may be. So don’t dismiss you parents as near-death’s-door pensioners who live under a rock, but like your own personal living embodiment of Wikipedia: full of information that is mostly useful, but can be wrong or irrelevant. Hopefully, once you’ve gone to them with all your teenage nightmares, maybe they’ll remember that it wasn’t a walk in the park and should lay off the whining that these are the best days of our lives, because if that’s so, then we might as well start whining now.

In a world where looks are everything, we are constantly trying to make ourselves the prettiest, most stylish or the best looking; sometimes no matter what the cost (have you seen what plastic surgeons are charging these days?!). Sometimes we gab over how skinny/pretty/handsome that guy/girl are and how we wish we look like that. Well, I got some bubbles to burst- it’s never gonna happen! For starters, most of the time there’s more air brushing than hairspray or fake tan ( not real beauty then, huh?) Also, if we all looked like that, how fucking dull would that be?! All walking around with our torsos on show, the whitest teeth possibly imaginable and (if you’re a girl) your boobs out, thinking we were just soo damn perfect looking! Enough is enough as far as I’m concerned.

The first point I’d like to make is that we should all be happy with the way we look. Okay, I realise that seems a big ask but it’s true. And if you can’t be happy with your body, then at least try and be content or grateful that you have a fully functioning body, or a body at all. Think of all those people who are born with severe physical disabilities or acquire some sort of disfigurement during their lives; do you really think they are moaning about how they’ve run out of foundation?! No, they’re just thankful to be alive and living a life! Maybe instead of obeying the media run opinion of beauty we have all (yes ALL) have been indoctrinated into, we should take a leaf out of their books and be grateful for our bodies as they are. Yes, I know we all want to be skinnier, taller, better skin or our bodies nice and toned, but we all need to appreciate what we have already, before we make any stupid changes prematurely. After all, looks aren’t everything, right?

This leads on to my second important point I want to get across to you media obsessed teens: looks are not everything! Surprised? You really shouldn’t be; since most of you are about 16/17 there are a few lessons you should all know by know. The first being life’s not fair, deal with it. The second being shit happens, get over it. And somewhere in that list falls “Looks are only skin deep. Looks fade, but personalities don’t”. I understand that this is hard to comprehend somewhat, I mean after all, we are usually attracted to people for the first time by their appearance, but after you fall in love with their personality: their likes, dreams, aspirations, little quirks. And if that is the case, then we should stop focusing on the outside so much and look inwards. Be yourself not what or who others want you to be whether that like a certain band, watch a certain television show or (in the relevance to this blog) dress or look a certain way. You are have the right to be your own person from the way you decide to do your hair, right down to those little habits we all have. We should be happy with who we are, both inside and out; if we’re not happy with ourselves, how do you expect other people to be happy with you?

In a nutshell what I’m trying to say is that looks aren’t everything and we should appreciate our bodies for what they are, rather than degrading them and marring them with multiple tattoos and piercings- well at least think, before you ink. The other thing is that looks are only an outward representation of what’s inside and although we all would like to look like supermodels who just walked off of the runway, what really matters is our character. Chessey, I know, but oh so true. You’ll see…

In a world where relationships are the norm and having sex outside of them is classed as whoreish, it can be hard to find a safe, acceptable middle ground. But recently, a lot more people have managed to brave the inbetween, thus birthing: Friends With Benefits! In easy terms, Friends With Benefits is having a strictly phyiscial relationship with a well-trusted and relaible friend who also wants/needs non-emotional sex. Sounds fun, right… but complications can occur. So is this new phenomenon something you should try? 

 First of all, sex is a beautiful thing. You should NEVER be embarassed about having it (unless it’s with the vacuum cleaner). And just as beautiful are your friends; someone who stands by you through anything and cares no matter what is a thing to cherish. So if these two things are both beautiful, surely they are compatible. Friends With Benefits arrangements can be born in many ways; maybe you’re both bored and horny, maybe you want a laugh or maybe you’re too scared to admit you actually like each other so you pick the easy way out (or maybe way in heehee). Having sex with your friend can be awkward, you might discover they love a good dirty sanchez (www.urbandictionary.com) or have some twisted foot fetish. If you can survive this awkwardness then your arrangement can survive too and soon you’ll realise that what you’ve started could be great.

Think about it, you’re comfortable with this person so there’s no need to feel insecure about your body, you get along so you can actaully spend time with each other before and after “the deed”, and there’s no over emotinal behaviour because you both know the deal (and if you don’t, you should agree upon it right now). However, things can go awry. The sex can go bad, or maybe there are other potential partners in the way. When this happens, it’s time to get out and get out QUICK! 

So this leads onto the idea of Fuck Buddies, which is a entirely different concept. Friends With Benefits clearly states that the friendship comes before the sex, Fuck Buddies is the complete reverse: sex over everything! You don’t even have to be friends; this arrangement is mainly for people who don’t want to commit to a relationship. This is where things get dangerous as, most of the time, someone will get hurt. Be that because someone misunderstands the situation, someone starts to feel cheap and nasty or the yearn for a relationship becomes too strong. However because you are not friends with this person, you may care less about their feelings so putting an end to the arrangment is easier. You didn’t spend time with them before, so you don’t have to feel bad about not spending time with them after.

This is in contrast to the aftermath of Friends With Benefits which can be brutal, bloody and barbaric. What you must understand is that your friendship will never be like it was before. Now that you know about your friend’s love of kinky bondage fun (for example) you wont be able to look at them in the same way again.

So ask yourself: are you ready to take the risk? And if you are, Friends With Benefits or Fuck Buddies, comfortable fun or mindless sex? Either way, you must get some enjoyment from your arrangement because if you don’t, what’s the point?  

Okay so, I realise I was meant to start writing about these Battles of The Proverbs, but I thought these clearly mindless riots were more important!

And they really are mindless and moronic. Does anyone know, or should I say remember, how this all broke out in the first place? Personally, it seems we have lost the method to this madness. As far as I can glean, these riots that have reached Blockbuster level, began in London after someone was shot by police. Now so far I cannot say whether this was an innocent mistake or a last resort, however it has shook the country to it’s core and dislodged (in some of us) the non-violent socially acceptable part of our brain which has lead to petrol bombing, looting and general rioting: if only we’d listened to the Kaiser Chiefs…

What appauls me is the fact that these riots have spread to cities as far as Liverpool and even Nottingham, yet the question on everyone’s minds is “Why there?” After all, in London there was something to riot about (but in no way am I justifying this), yet this rioting epidemic has been taken over by the mindless thuggish chavs who plague every city and take any chance or excuse to wreak havoc!

Aswell as being predicted by the Kasier Chiefs, it also seems to me that history is repeating itself. Although some of my friends who read this will be unfamilar with what happened back then, this day and age is gradually becoming the 1980’s all over again- like effing deja vu! Tory leader in power- Check; recession- Check; Loss of jobs- Check, resulting in rioting, lotting and the such- Check! Clearly there are somethings that maybe would’ve stopped this from reocuuring like, I don’t know, voting the Conservatives into power again!! I can safely say I bet those people who did vote Tory are kicking themselves right now; and if not, they’re been kicked by some else for sure! It’s turning into a very vicious cycle. First, a recession that when a general election comes around, is blamed on by the party in power (labour). Then they completley opposing party is voted in to see if they can fix what the former has done to destroy the country’s economic. The opposing party make drastic changes that they say will help; they make everything worse culminating into riots that sweep the county. Am I right?

The goverment seem to be like those people we know who brag about their “conquests” if you catch my drift because when it comes to it, they’re all talk and no trousers. The Tories have blamed it all on Labour for getting us into this mess of economic chaos and they vowed they would clean it up! Yes, we all know it would take a while but so far they are not living up to their now empty promises! If anything, they’ve made everything a hell of a lot worse! Hopefully, in five years times, we’ll be able to vote in a decent goverment…

So now that I’ve ranted and hopefully explained my view, let us hope that one day soon we can put an end to this cycle adn finally have a government who can do right by it’s country and people for a change!